Ask Sara: Is Tinder in Japan Only For Setting Up?

Ask Sara: Is Tinder in Japan Only For Setting Up?

I’m a solitary woman looking up to now really in Japan. Everyone keeps suggesting Tinder, but isn’t it simply for casual hookups?

By Sara whom Nov 24, 2016 4 min read

Our resident love-in-Japan author, Sara whom, answers your concerns on sets from dating guidelines to locating a partner for love, wedding and more. Got concern you’d like to inquire about Sara? e-mail it to

Hook me personally up with a relationship that is committed?

Dear Sara,

A little bit of background: we at first stumbled on Japan for a holiday that is working with my boyfriend, but he wound up cheating on me personally having a coworker. We really considered packing all my things and going home but after thinking I decided to make the most of my remaining time in Tokyo about it. I came across a long-lasting work and I’m now really delighted right right here, but there’s something that’s been bothering me personally.

It’s been about 6 months since I split up with my ex and i do believe I’m ready up to now once more but I’m finding it truly difficult to fulfill individuals.

I’ve heard of Tinder, but I’ve never tried online dating sites prior to. Could it be a truly good method to fulfill dudes? Home, I became underneath the impression Tinder ended up being only for hookups, but I’ve been told it is different right right here.

Additionally, as a result of my ex, i find it hard to now trust guys and I’m not thinking about any such thing casual. You think Tinder might be great for me personally? How do I determine if a man just really wants to get set? Additionally, just what could be the best thing to accomplish on a date that is first?

Sorry for all your questions!

Dear TV,

To start with, I’m happy to hear you chose to move ahead. Often, things happen for a good explanation and you also can’t say for sure, you may become fulfilling the person of one’s ambitions right right right here!

As a lady on Tinder, you shall get a great deal of matches. Having seen my man buddies with the software, i could let you know they literally swipe straight to every profile that is single. Therefore, you’re actually having the entire range. I’ve seen guys whoever pages stated, “Looking for my first Asian” to other people describing (at size) the way they are truly wanting a buddy to apply English with. There is certainly some truth into the talk that Tinder is significantly diffent right here, possibly because one-night really really really stands are evidently less frequent in Japan.

Having said that, once you match with somebody, wait you first until they contact. They will if they like your profile. If they meet the right person while I do think there are many Tinder guys in Japan looking for casual sex, even some of these guys are not necessarily opposed to a relationship. As with any dating situation, be clear from the beginning and inform them precisely what you’re searching for.

The danger is whether or not they will lie for you or perhaps not. Regrettably, you won’t be able to inform unless you meet them. Watch out for the most obvious signs, like conference for a glass or two, opting for karaoke towards final train or even the classic that is ol’ “Let’s Netflix.”

In terms of date some ideas, you will need to fulfill them during daytime but don’t make it lunch or coffee. Unless there’s instant chemistry, it could be actually embarrassing to stay right in front of the stranger that is total attempt to make discussion, more so if there’s a language barrier. Head to an event, an exhibition or A japanese yard to admire the autumn foliage rather. You’ll have actually plenty to share because of this.

Don’t give up hope if your experiences that are initial everything you anticipate. I understand — and know of — plenty of committed partners whom came across on Tinder right right here in Japan.

Nevertheless, if you discover Tinder is not actually your cup tea, you really need to provide the app Meetup the opportunity. It is actually removing right right here plus it’s a way that is great satisfy individuals with that you have actually provided passions in a bunch setting. Some occasions are so popular you ought to register months ahead of time! There’s also Happn, OKCupid and Pairs so that you can take to. Best of luck!

Maybe you have utilized Tinder? What get experiences been like? Any advice because of this week’s reader on internet dating in Japan? Inform us when you look at the feedback!

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